>Where are you going?

– To the moon.

>Have you built a rocket-ship?

-It was more of a figure of speech.

>Oh … I thought you had achieved the height of DIY space pioneering.

-One can only wish.

>It’s an admirable goal.



>I’d love to go to the moon. I feel like the astronauts really underused their vacations there.

-Those weren’t vacations.

>Um … beg to differ. They played golf.

-I’m pretty sure they weren’t drinking mai-tais amid the moon rocks.

>Alright whatever … in their jaunts to the moon for scientific shenanigans.

– Shenanigans? It’s not a fuckin swingers club!

> For Scientific Pursuits … better?

– Much

> So ..

– What?

> Where are you going?

– Out.

> Why?

– To see friends.

> Friends? I thought I was your only friend.

– No…I have other people in which I enjoy socializing with.

> Really? I find that incredibly hard to believe.

– Why’s that?

> Oh just your face.

– Just my face?! What the hell type of statement is that?

> Jesus, it was just a joke! I didn’t realize your visage was such a touchy matter for you.

– I’m not vain.

> I didn’t say you were vain. I was fuckin kidding by the way.

– Sorry…no I’m just going out with some people I haven’t seen in awhile catching up, you know…

>Yeah. I know. I hate that dance routine. That’s why I don’t catch up … I let go and move on.

– That’s sad.

> It’s really not.

– But like … all of your past friends you’ve just let them go?

> If they feel compelled to keep in touch with me, absolutely … but otherwise, what’s the use? Excess baggage.

– That’s callus man.

> No, it’s self preservation.

– What about me?

> What about you?

– Am I going to be just some footnote someday?

> You’re the only one who knows that. I don’t cut ties, they tend to disintegrate on my watch. But something tells me…oh nevermind.

– What?

> Nevermind. It’s nothing.

– No, what?

> Why do you care?

– Self-preservation.

> That doesn’t make any sense.

– Then talk to me…

> You’re so fucking dim. Do I have to spell it for you?

– I’m illiterate.

> That’s retarded.

– That’s non-inclusive language.

> You’re going to be late you fucking idiot.

– Late for what?

> Friends, non?

– Ah, yes … friends.

> Talk to you later.

– I’ll call you.

> Whatever.


– Fuckin hell I’m exhausted.

– You didn’t do anything today … how can you be exhausted?

– Talking to you is exhausting.

– The staggering philosophical insights can be overwhelming, I understand.

– Or you reciting inane conversation you overheard at work is tiring and no longer endearing.

– That hurts.

– Suck it up puhlease.

– Why do I call you?

– Very good question … I was just about to ask the same thing.

– I dunno.

– Thanks … it’s nice to know you’re really thinking of me.

– Why’re you so testy tonight ?

– Can’t I be annoyed?

– What is there to be annoyed at?

– Stop with the questions!

– I didn’t realize …

– Do you ever feel like everything you do is futile? That everything you work for is simply some abstract illusion.

– Everyday.

– I wish my life was a movie … hitting all the right plot points with being at the right place at the right time. Ideal.

– If you’re life was a movie what type would it be?

– Hey I’m asking the questions here!

– Sorry

– If you’re life was a movie what would it be?

– Probably a screw-ball comedy from the forties … His Girl Friday is basically my life.

– You’re Rosalind Russell?

– A boy can dream. You?

– Indie walk and talk …

– Figures.

– I’m a sucker for predictable but witty and sincere dialogue.


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